John
Banzhaf: In His Own Litigious Words
Say what you will about John Banzhaf, George Washington University law professor and leader of the litigious anti-food crusade, at least he makes no attempt to conceal his scurrilous designs. On the contrary, this litigating busy body has clearly articulated his utopian vision: an America in which everyone’s stomach is empty and every lawyer’s wallet is full.
The notorious professor has apparently reached the conclusion that any profitable industry — excluding the litigation business, of course — must be bled dry. Fast food is his current target. And he has vowed to slay this monster in the name of "public health."
In his relentless quest to turn America into a nation of Kate Moss doppelgangers, Banzhaf has fallen head over heels in love with any and every lawsuit that demonizes those who dare to feed us. Fortunately, you don’t have to take our word for it; he’s said so himself:
"We’re
going to sue them and sue them and sue them."
—
CBS, "CBS Sunday Morning" 8/11/02.
"You
could sue practically anybody under this theory. If this lawsuit
gets anywhere, it'll make the asbestos [litigation] look like
a walk in the park."
—
National Law Journal 12/9/02.
"Somewhere
there is going to be a judge and a jury that will buy this, and
once we get the first verdict, as we did with tobacco, it will
open the floodgates."
—
New York Daily News 1/22/03.
"The
very fact that lawyers are going to be making money out of [suing
restaurants] is exactly what we're counting on, 'cause that's
what made it with tobacco."
—
CNBC, "Capital Report" 5/27/03.
"McDonald's
may also be liable to pay punitive damages, and compensation for
the pain and suffering of those who became seriously ill… I would not be surprised to see McDonald's paying more than $50
billion over the next decade."
—
The Observer 7/20/03.
"We're
also now looking at going after schools and school boards and
even school board members."
—
National Public Radio, "Talk of the Nation" 8/8/03.
"One
of the most effective ways to get social change is to sue people."
—
Detroit News 12/14/03.
"Never
underestimate the tenacity of a lawyer working on a contingency
fee."
—
Copley News Service 9/14/04.
"We
must remember that the anti-tobacco movement did not just sue
the tobacco companies. We sued lots of people."
—
The Washington Times 9/20/04.
"When
lawyers see how lucrative these are they will all join in."
—
The Washington Times 10/1/04.
So there it is. Through frivolous lawsuits, Banzhaf has found the perfect means of simultaneously satisfying his greed and his messianic complexes. He has acknowledged that money for lawyers is a driving force behind the anti-food litigation, and that he is willing to sue anyone. And if anyone honestly believes that litigation is the solution to America’s obesity "crisis," we leave you with one more Banzhaf quote:
"Everybody
knows that, if you want to lose weight, you eat less, less calorie
input, and more exercise. You don't have to learn that."
—
MSNBC, "The Abrams Report" 1/15/03.
Apparently, Mr. Banzhaf, "everybody" no longer knows that. "Everybody" mysteriously became ignorant victims because it is profitable for you to claim a clown in big red shoes seduced America into weight gain.
October 21, 2004